[ but. there's no way he can say any of the following with the same tone; he knows how ridiculous it sounds and he fuckin hates it, thanks. ]

I can—it lets me turn into any animal, not just giant, for up to 24 hours. I can talk with any animal, and control the kind I transform into. The most I've done with it is try to get info outta the random animals that show up outta nowhere, which has been a bust for the most part. [ beat ] ...the crabs were already doin' the dancing thing when I got there, for the record, I got no clue why.